Duke Basketball: Blue Devil bandwagon has no room for former haters

Before the Duke basketball team begins its NCAA Tournament journey tonight, spectators should know the bandwagon doesn’t allow boarding by anyone who despised Mike Krzyzewski’s program before the arrival of Zion and Co.

This isn’t going to work. Writers and fans who always loathed the Duke basketball program are popping up everywhere attempting to take part in the Blue Devils’ festivities.

True Duke fans, like myself, are not yet ready or willing to share Zion Williamson with the outside world — certainly not with the haters and at least not until the freshman sensation leaves us no choice by becoming a favorite of a fortunate NBA fanbase after this season.

Same goes for R.J. Barrett, Cam Reddish, Tre Jones, and any other member of the No. 1 overall seed in the NCAA Tournament.

So let this be a warning to those lifelong haters of Duke who ooh and aah at the current greatest-show-on-earth Blue Devils:

Put down and back away from the royal-blue pom-poms that you are renting. Ditto for the megaphone that you have inexcusably used to express your supposed newfound love for a team that you say suddenly makes Duke cool.

You’re not worthy to be an outward supporter of the betting-favorite Blue Devils. Not now. Not ever. It’s an exclusive club in which you don’t belong.

While the inking of “Duke” inside the center box of your bracket — like it appears on roughly 40 percent of the millions in existence — does prove your desire to win your office pool, it does not give you the right to root for coach Mike Krzyzewski’s current masterpiece-in-the-making as if you are a legit Duke fan.

Your bracket will not serve as your invite to the afterparty if the Blue Devils cut down the nets in Minneapolis on April 8.

Your sickening display of support for Duke this season does not excuse you stalking the GOAT-player-in-the-making.

After all, Williamson chose to play for Duke for many of the reasons that you once viewed as your validation for despising Duke in the first place.

Remember that.

Remember that Williamson adores Coach K, the object of your contempt in large part due to you — and sports fans everywhere — having little choice but to watch countless hours of him (the college game’s all-time wins leader with 1,129 and counting) and his consistently successful squads (five national titles and counting) on ESPN every season dating back decades.

Remember what the 6-foot-7, 280-pound Spartanburg, S.C., native said — and how bitter with jealousy you were when you heard it — during the announcement of his college choice on Jan. 20, 2018:

“I will be joining The Brotherhood of Duke University.”

Remember that #TheBrotherhood includes notable catalysts to your disdain for Duke such as Danny Ferry, Bobby Hurley, Christian Laettner, Steve Wojciechowski, Shane Battier, J.J. Redick, Kyle Singler, and Grayson Allen.

Remember that Williamson reportedly declared to his family when he was five years old that he would one day be a Dukie. Remember that Redick, the head-bobber you loved to hate, was the star in Durham at that time and therefore likely played a part in shaping the young Zion’s love for the Blue Devils.

Remember that Williamson hearts Duke so much that, even after blowing through his left shoe and spraining his right knee on Feb. 20, he has not quit early so as to go ahead and secure a record shoe deal. Instead, he is on a quest with his teammates to further adorn Cameron Indoor Stadium’s rafters with a total of four banners all their own (two down, two to go).

ALSO READ: Blue Devils on pace to require record-tying rafter space

Remember that the ACC Player of the Year and Rookie of the Year — who is averaging 21.1 points, 8.9 rebounds, 2.2 steals, and 1.8 blocks and will soon surely also be the Naismith Player of the Year and Defensive Player of the Year and then the first pick in the NBA Draft — will become Duke’s all-time greatest ambassador, thereby helping the program land top recruits and remain at the center of attention even after Krzyzewski’s retirement.

Remember that Duke — even if it was to lose to No. 16-seed North Dakota State tonight at 7:10 p.m. (on CBS) or before the Big Dance’s opening weekend concludes — will soon own bragging rights for being the former stomping grounds of the man whose first name will likely appear on the shoes of millions of kids who want to be just like him for generations to come.

ALSO READ: Zion Williamson could own shoe company

Remember that the Duke basketball bandwagon has reserved seating. Not only did you not book your spot in time, but you also don’t pass the required test to ever jump on board: a test that checks veins for the superior shade of blue blood running through them.

Most importantly, remember — especially you UNC fans who make Duke fans queasy by saying nice things about the current Blue Devils — that no matter who plays for your favorite program in the future, this Duke fan won’t catch feelings for said program.

More from Ball Durham

Take this as the threat that it is: If you continue threatening to dampen my joy by trying to join us Duke fans, who have always been too cool for you, by relishing in the success of these Blue Devils — who enter the NCAA Tournament with a 29-5 overall record and fresh off the program’s 21st ACC Tournament title — I will have no choice but to contact college basketball authorities.

I will demand they seize your TV and any devices you use to watch March Madness while serving you with a restraining order that prohibits you from ever again witnessing the team that derives most of its unmatched beauty from the mashup of a ball-hawking Jones, a swishing Reddish, a driving Barrett, and a dunking Williamson.

Please just take back the nice things you said about the Blue Devils and change your behavior right away — i.e., go back to forever hating on Duke and incessantly calling Coach K “ratface” and a slew of other names. Because your asinine criticism of the Blue Devils has been an abundant source of this Duke fan’s delight ever since the days of Laettner and Ferry.

Surely, by writing this article that I hope you back-to-being-Duke-haters view as obnoxious, selfish, and elitist, I’ve now helped you remember — no matter the amazing vertical leap, otherworldly strength, or exquisite moves of any players who don Blue Devil jerseys — why you can’t stomach Duke and why you should leave the loving of Duke to real Duke fans.

It’s a fanbase we don’t want you to comprehend or ever consider joining again.

In conclusion, Duke fans do hope your bracket wins as a result of your having chosen the correct champion. That being said, we don’t need your help in cheering on the Blue Devils to help make sure that happens.

Next. Coach K's five sweetest comeback wins. dark

And we certainly won’t need your help singing the lyrics of what would be OUR — which doesn’t include YOU — “One Shining Moment” as soon as it happens.

Home/Duke Basketball